Tuesdays With Moron

Welcome to Tuesday, and a new feature around here – Tuesday’s With Moron. Basically a dot-dot-dot type ramblings, with a look around at things not necessarily WSU Football-Related. We need to step outside the box now and then, and it’s the off-season, so, what the hell.

Leading off…..A-Rod, seriously? Why? Ok, you are an A-class jackass who is phony as it gets, but you were headed to Cooperstown sans juice. AND you lied to the world on 60 Minutes in 2007. Now you admit it, but spin it as the reason you did so was because of the immense pressure of $252 million? Poor guy.

The deal with A-Rod is this – here’s a kid who immensely wants to be liked by everyone, incredibly insecure and one who says and does anything and everything to be LIKED. Even if he sounds phony and rehearsed, Eddie Haskell style. And if everyone was doing it in 2001-2003 down in hell’s exhaust pipe (Arlington), you can see a guy like that totally giving in to the peer pressure and go along with the rest of the crowd. Still, it doesn’t excuse what he did, and it certainly taints everything he has done from that point forward….if he did, in fact, ONLY start in 2001? How can we even know for sure when he started dabbling in PED’s? Should we just take his word for it and root on his pursuit of the HR title? Did he simply move on to HGH, where there still isn’t a 100% reliable testing program? Maybe he’s still on something? How can we believe anything he says about the issue?

Well, congrats on blowing your Hall shoo-in, fraudulent one. And welcome to Pete Rose’s living hell. But at least you have plenty of company (McGwire, Raffy P, Barry, Rocket, Canseco, etc). Curt Schilling is a blow-hard who loves to hear himself talk but he is right on here. Expose the rest of the 103 names on the list failed steroid test. They were supposed to remain anonymous, but what other choice is there now? If they leave things as they are, they will eventually come out and it will be ugly when it does. Otherwise, as Schilling says, they ALL live under the slimy cloud of suspicion, witch-hunt style. Might as well “come clean”, so to speak…..

Christian Bale is a hot piece of property where every thing he touches is going to hit the $100 million mark and T4 looks like it will be a huge hit this summer…..but he sure sounds like a colossal PRICK on that tape.

I loved him in Batman Begins and Dark Knight, and he was good in The Prestige, 3:10 to Yuma, and American Psycho. But wow, did he go off. The next Russell Crowe, perhaps, right down to the surly off-camera a-hole-ness?….

So how ’bout that stimulus package? Let’s hope it works. MORE pork please! Maybe they can pack in some Martin Stadium money for phase IV? Come on Barack!…

The UW money grab appears to be dying on the table in Oly, per the biggest jerk in the House, Frank Chopp. He said in a recent interview that the UW stadium is “no longer a priority”, where he’s even getting mixed signals from Mark Emmert himself. ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY RECESSION!!…..Speaking of UW and dying on the table, so ends the brief mutt career of one Jim Michalzcik, as he’s decided the worst NFL job under the most insane, senile owner in pro sports is better than Montlake. The guy never lost a game in Seattle. But at least he was around to help Sarkisian sign the worst recruiting class in modern UW history. All for more money than Paul Wulff makes as head coach at WSU. Way to vet your choice there. And good luck Jim. We still love your Coug-ness, and you are now officially welcome to attend all WSU football functions and the like…..Tough times for UW huh? As BH boldly pointed out yesterday, let’s see….Sarkisian has:

1) Stolen USC’s Defensive Coordinator, and pissed off Pete Carroll in the process.
2) Went after SC recruits (and FAILED to turn them to purple-n-gold) and again, pissed off Pete Carroll in the process.
3) Went after UCLA’s Defensive Coordinator DeWayne Walker (and FAILED)
4) Stole CAL’s lead offensive coach…..making Jeff Tedford angry…..only to see him eject prematurely.
5) Offered Utah’s heralded WR coach and offensive mind a top spot, who takes it….then wakes up in the morning and says NEVER MIND!
6) Had a few recruiting violations and played dumb in the process…..even though he’s been a supposedly “big time recruiting force” in SoCal for many years?
7) Finally, tried to steal EVERY WSU verbal commit in-state, and went o-fer in that department.

Quite a start. And they haven’t even been blown out by LSU yet. Honeymoon is just about over…..

In the WSU universe, the Stanford game next fall has been moved to Thursday night. No blazing, blaring, official announcement yet…but check out the official Stanford schedule? Looks pretty clear doesn’t it? The question is, what network will host the game? FSN? Or maybe ESPN2? Rumors are out there that it could be nationally televised. Also a rumor to look for one more game to be moved later in the year to Thursday. Maybe on Halloween weekend against the team eternally dressed for that particular holiday?? We shall see….So should Tony roll with the kids or stick with vets to try and salvage this season? I am on the side of BH on this one. Play the kids or else face not only a disappointing post-season watching at home anyway, but a scary 2009-2010 season to boot….Have ya seen the guy pitching Sham-WOW? Wow is right, as in WOW are you ugly. That guy has a mug born for 3 AM infomercials. I heard the product is a complete fraud as well….So Chris Brown beat up the beautiful 19-year old sensation Rihanna!?!? WTF is that?

I recall Kevin Durant in a post-NBA draft interview saying his dream was to, well, you know….I won’t even say it….but Rihanna was prominently featured…..Larry Fitzgerald, enough already with the one-handed circus catches and game-changing TD’s. You’re great. We get it. Now please go back to sucking with the rest of the AZ Cardinals. Seahawk fans everywhere are ready for your to go away now….please……


17 Responses to “Tuesdays With Moron”

  1. AtlantaCoug Says:

    Nice Sedi. Loved the ramble. Regarding A-Rod, you have to take a scripted, rehearsed, damage controlled apology with a grain of salt. I am still waiting for one of these guys to say, “Yeah, I took them to get an edge and I would do it again”. The apology is a ‘sorry you got me’ not a ‘sorry I did it’.
    -This time of year I miss the Supes badly (especially seeing Durant develop into THE MAN)
    -I agree, go young with Basketball team and I actually think next year we will do OK (not NCAA but OK)
    -Only problem I see with Montlake not getting their money is the ‘future Sonics’ probably won’t either. Bad time for a recession.

  2. Sedihawk Says:

    Thanks ATL. And don’t sweat the Sonics just yet. There is supposedly a massive convention center bill that is going to be coming out this session, and it’s going to be huge ($750 million?). It is rumored that the Key $75 million might be crammed into the same bill, as both projects could draw from the same pool of money. It’s not over yet.

    Also there is a rumor that the NBA is going to announce a small NBA realignment plan, where OKC moves to a more geographical location that makes sense. And the rumor is that they would actually swap places with MEMPHIS, a team that is strugga-LING. Hmm, Memphis in the Northwest division!? Tennessee isn’t any more NW than OKC. Stay tuned.

  3. Chris '04 Says:

    LOL, love the new Tuesday “format”. But remember, never go full retard.

  4. Longball Says:

    UPDATE: Shame Wow! Vince has a new infomercial out for a food chopping device which includes the quote, “You’re gonna love my nuts.”

    I swear on a stack of bibles, it’s true. He’s like a sideshow attraction and the 8th wonder of the world all at the same time.

  5. Goonast Says:

    Hate the shaw wow guy. He is a freakish creature. Love the new feature guys! Never go full retard LOL! Love that movie. Edgy post and I like that.

  6. TiltingRight Says:

    Less Vince of ShamSham, more Rihanna.


  7. CW Says:

    In the spirit of rambling, why don’t we give a shout out to Kyle Weaver on his NBA progress as of late…great to see a Coug doing it on the national stage….Though the jury is still out how cool a cat he still is. 1st hand word from former teammates is that be big-timed them all and has gone awol from returning calls, texts, e-mails and the like.

  8. Sarkscumian Says:

    Weaver big-timing? That SUCKS. Of course he is a big contributor to an awful NBA team so he has earned the right to tell everyone to piss off.

  9. Stryper Says:

    I love how agent Z Michalzcik did his job. He chose to accept the mission.
    1) Get inside the UW hierarchy
    2) sabotage their recruiting class and help commit violations
    3) Get out. A cushy NFL job with no accountability will be waiting for you. This is your mission if you choose to accept it.

  10. Logan Says:

    You should hear the audio of christian bale’s apology. it’s very sincere, so i dont think we have a second coming of russel crowe.

    Also, sterk would be an idiot to accept thursday HOME games. i dont care if they are away games, but martin stadium would be quite empty for a thursday night game. there’s no way i could get over there for thursday games with how little vacation my job allows. i understand getting big money from TV, but at the expense of a home field advantage is dumb.

  11. Sedihawk Says:

    Hey Logan, I did hear the apology. Believe me, I’m a big Bale fan myself and I buy his apology. It was great. But in that moment, WOW, scary anger right there! I also heard Ron Howard on Howard Stern last week defend Bale (Ron Howard’s daughter was in the scene with Bale when that all went down). Ron Howard just said that hey, things get intense on all sets at key moments. So whatever. I will be seeing T4 the first weekend it’s out this summer, and can’t wait for the next Batman, that’s for sure.

    I agree with you on the Thursday games, except for one – the labor day weekend game. If they play that one on a Saturday, aren’t you looking at a lot of empty seats as well? I was at the 1997 WSU – UCLA game, a classic duel between Leaf and Cade McNown, and Leon Bender’s goal-line tackle which basically gave WSU the Rose Bowl that year (while we didn’t realize it at the time, that might have been THE play of that season!). But there must have been 25,000 people in the stands, and that was on that Saturday of labor day. But if you play it on a beautiful Thursday evening on national TV, you can at least have a shot at a good student turnout, and that’s where the most energy from the crowd comes from anyway? I don’t know, I guess there really isn’t a good answer for that particular weekend. It’s a lot like the home game played in Pullman before Thanksgiving weekend. Remember ’07 Oregon state? I’m still trying to forget it. But there were MAYBE 15k there. That should never happen.

  12. Logan Says:

    Yeah i was at that game in ’07. That was completely discouraging driving across the state on that friday and seeing the steady stream of “fans” driving west. to make matters worse, it was flippin senior day! Brink (even if you didn’t like him you had to applaud what he did and his effort during his career), bumpus…we like ya but we won’t stick around to salute you.

    i agree with the labor day weekend game. it’s hard to come up with a good scenario for a home game in Pullman for it. This year is going to be even worse for me, i have two weddings to go to that weekend. gonna be a doozy…

  13. '03CouveCoug Says:


    Love, love, love the Tuesday ramblings! Keep ‘em coming!

    Had to laugh at the whole A-rod steroid deal…it was almost inevitable that a guy as shallow and superficial as he is reported to be would succumb to the “pressure” of a quarter-billion bucks and stick some needles in his a$$. More like he wanted so badly to be the greatest hitter of all time that he was willing to compromise any shred of integrity that he may have had to juice up his already prolific natural ability and go after the home run record.

    Having seen the new product being offered by that tool from the sham-wow commercial, I too can attest that he does say “You’re gonna love my nuts.” I thought I was going to fall off the couch laughing. My wife thought I’d lost it.

    Anybody that does anything to damage the lovely Rihanna deserves to be beaten with a retard stick.

    Find it hard to believe that Kyle is big timing people on purpose…by all accounts; he’s working his tail off in extra practice and film study, which has gotten him a lot more PT in recent weeks. Perhaps that’s the reason for the lack of returned calls?

    As for the Thursday night vs. Saturday of Labor Day/Thanksgiving Break game thing…you know what cures poor attendance? Winning. I was at WSU when we opened on a Thursday night vs. Idaho and the next season we had a Thursday night game vs. Montana-friggin’ State. Both games easily had 30K+ because there was a good product on the field. Granted, the Idaho game had 5k Vandal backers in the east end zone, but the attendance for MSU was impressive.

  14. Soze Says:

    Agreed on the Thursday night game… I’d do it based on television money alone. I don’t think alumni make much of a difference. If the team is good, people will come. If the team sucks, the alumni sections are relatively empty.

  15. kaddy Says:

    I was at that game in ’97 vs. ucla, and I think the announced crowd was 22,000. You couldn’t have asked for a better day for football, either.

  16. BH Says:

    You gotta think recruiting as well folks.

    I know that we have a LONG way to go still, but that first game is as close to a level playing field as you are going to get. heck, look at us v. Clay Bennett State University this year. We were actually IN that game. But, if we played that game one week later; we lose 77-7.

    so, we play on Thursday night on the Deuce when every Tom, Dick, and Harry wants to see ANYTHING besides baseball, we nip the Trees, and Reece Davis and company get to talk about us for a night.

    We’ll never get such press on a Saturday..

  17. kaddy Says:

    When I go back and think about it, I think you were right, Hawk. I think the announced attendance at that game in ’97 was 26,000, but I believe those were tickets sold, and the actual attendance was closer to 22.

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